All it takes is just a cup of Iced Caramel Macchiato to set the thoughts rolling and roll it did.After satisfying my "retail therapy"urges by paying damages of around $200 to shops around Marina Square and Suntec City,I decided that I deserved my favorite cuppa and settled on the not so congested Starbucks Coffeehouse at One Fullerton and then...
Im not trying to sound "emotional" here but after sipping that refreshing Macchiato,I asked myself if Im happy with being the person that I am now and and truth be told,I couldnt find an answer to that.I just cant.
If education is concerned,I guess that Im doing alright and I never regretted coming to Shatec but if "money willing",I don't think I will stop with just a diploma as but hopefully a Bachelor's Degree with a university in Swiss,Australia or even here back home.That I have to wait after I served my time in National Service.
If National Service is concerned,even though Im not a big fan of having to serve the nation,I think Im doing just fine and try to enjoy myself since Im going to be in service for at least a year more but Im thrust upon to manage the financial funds and it's killing me but I will live through to as my objective of serving is O-R-D loh!!!
If social life is concerned,this is something that Im not too sure if I've done enough justice to make myself happy or disappoint myself.2 failed relationships.The latter being the distraught one.Not to forget,involved in a social fling that was heading nowhere up until it ended abruptly.
Is is just me or am I a jinx in this type of relationships?Everywhere I turned,I see myself crowded with friends who are happily attached,some engaged or even hitched and here I am now heading nowhere.Is it a curse or am I lacking self-belief if hitching with the other sex or am I just too picky in getting the one?Do I have that answer?To be honest,I don't have a freaking clue to answer that!Dont get me wrong,I have made tonnes of friends but sometimes,I just need that one person.
If I could find any possible reason,maybe I just couldnt engage or relate to the opposite sex.In some way or another,there will be a blip along the way and then the whole thing just went "Kaput".Just like that.
In all honesty,the only 2 girls that I could relate to or maybe can relate to me are the 2 ever iritating but supportive shorties,Trace and Stance.Haha.Im not too sure if they think if Im a close friend to them but as far as Im concerned,those two are the first two names I scroll through my phonebook if Im dealing with any problems or just bored.Don't get me wrong.Im not in love with them like emotionally.Hell no!!!Not only are they happily attached with their guys which Im happy for them but also I treat them like my own little sisters that I never had even though I wanna smack them on their heads when they iritate me!!!Haha.Btw Trace and Stance,Im not gay,Im straight you a holes!!!You will get me it from me soon.Haha.Hate you both!!!.Hahaha.
Im not really sure of where my life will turn but I hope it's pointing north but not south.Sometimes,it sucks to be what I am now but I will live through it.I kept thinking that there is another person who is far much worse than me and it helps when I think like that even though I know it's a bad thought to begin with but oh well.For now,I need to erase those past memories and tragedies first.I know that fairy tales won't happen in this world as Im a realist but I hope that one day,when I sit down again and sip my favourite Caramel Macchiato,I can proudly say"Hey,Im a happy guy now"
Just Take It By The Day!!!
